comps mini-journal, day 12.

Is it over yet? I'm tired. Editing is a slog. Still have a less than half of today's essay to finish and then one more essay to do tomorrow. Much refining to do on Thursday. Seeing my advisor at a BBQ today kind of terrified me, but hey, that's why people drink beer at BBQs, right?


I'm getting whiny. When I talk to people about my comps, this is their reaction:

I am exhausted. It's hard sustaining interest in these essays every day when I am not sure they say what I want them to say about my mastery of the texts. I'm getting to the point where I think about alternate ways I could have answered the questions. That can be useful, not for the moment (far too late to make changes) but as I think about the defense, it helps me to account for the choices I made. 


It occurred to me tonight that this is largely an editorial process. There's only so much you can say in 10-12 pages, and everything that is in the essays is a result of choices I've made. I hate the exercise but it is making me think differently about the choices I make as a writer. Creating a narrative is a very deliberate undertaking. 

I have been eating ice cream every day for at least a week-- the best roommate ever was nice enough to pick me up some at The Sev last night. My work the last few days has been powered by the delicious beans roasted at Tacoma's Valhalla Coffee Co. I am SO glad I splurged and ordered some of my homebrew! It's the little things that keep me hanging on.