best of the weekend.

In honor of the Oscars, here are some of the best things offered up by last weekend:

Best Oscars Dress: Katherine Heigl
Runners Up: Amy Adams and Helen Mirren

Best Example of What a Career in the Academy Does to You: Crotchety retired professor secretly builds cottage in back yard.

Best Answer to Concerns I Already Had but Got in Trouble for Expressing: The Paper reassures me Obama probably won't get shot.

Best Book I Read Over the Weekend: Michel Foucault's History of Sexuality, Vol. 1 (sexuality is a discourse of power! yeah!)

Best Cheap Entertainment in the SLC: Pioneer Theatre's Midsummer Night's Dream for only 5 clamshells ("student rush" 1 hour before to fill seats, suckas)

Best Drug Store Eye Makeup Ever: Revlon Powder Liner

Best Thing to Tide Me Over Until 30 Rock is Back On: Tiny Fey on SNL saying "Bitch is the New Black" and advertising birth control that "may cause you to grow a second vagina."*

and lastly,

Best Thing that Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, that I am Now Suffering For: sleeping for 13 hours last night. At least you're getting a blog post out of it.

*hopefully you'll have better luck with the nbc website than I did... I watched the clips on youtube but they take that copyrighted stuff down really, really fast.